Bad Ideas Of Our Time #22

Having a row in a restaurant while drunk with your (even drunker) boyfriend. Then storming out dramatically and flouncing home, only to realise that you've forgotten your house keys.

Cue a rather shamefaced phonecall to the aforementioned drunk boyfriend, asking him to come and let you in. Pizza for dinner, humble pie for dessert. Mmmm, tasty.

 

To make matters worse, the argument was about ballet. Ballet, I ask you.
1.8.06 10:10


Ballot box

Is anybody else out there going to the End Of The Road Festival?

Trilby and I are thinking of going, but it's at the beginning of September and I'm scared that it might be cold and rainy. And it would mean buying a new tent, as Trilby's has gone all mouldy.

However, British Sea Power, Badly Drawn Boy, Guillemots and Jim Noir are all playing, so maybe a little rain wouldn't matter...

 

Should I go? Help me decide, people of the Internet!
9.8.06 09:27


Magnum force

I have a champagne hangover. That hasn't happened in a while.

A friend of mine is the barman at Boujis, nightclub of choice for young royals* and braying West London types. His lovely girlfriend Laetitia had her birthday party there last night.

As you can imagine, there was a lot of free alcohol.

I can't remember what time they poured me into the cab. I know I fell asleep while eating toast, because the bed was full of crumbs this morning. And I'm pretty sure I was still drunk when I wobbled into work, half an hour late and still wearing last night's eyeliner.

Ahhh. It's just like the old days. I'd feel nostalgic if it wasn't for the pain in my noggin.

Incidentally, my mate the barman was mentioned recently in an article about Boujis in the Daily Mail (blee). They said he looked like a hobbit. It's true, he does. Specifically this hobbit:

It's really quite uncanny. "Daily Mail in accurate reporting shock!"

 

* apparently, Harry and Wills never have to pay for drinks. Also, they never, ever tip. Free for those who can afford it, etc. etc. etc.
10.8.06 11:41


Lines are now closed

After a deluge* of responses to the whole "do I go to the End Of The Road Festival" question, I have come to a decision.

We're going.

So I have booked the tickets and, in a moment of madness, also bought a new tent to replace Trilby's old one, which was all mildewed and stinky.

And what a tent!

Yes, it is covered in pictures of fish. Tremendous. Also excellent is the fact it was reduced from £100 to £50. Oh, how I love a bargain.

 

 

* may be hyperbole
10.8.06 16:25


Benefits

There are downsides to working at Clerkenwell Towers. The crushing boredom, for one. Also the crappy pay and the jerky colleagues and the annoying boss.

However, every now and then I realise why I like working here. Generally when one of my toner suppliers sends me a BOX FULL OF GODDAMN CHOCOLATE!

That ain't no ordinary chocolate either, hell no. We're talking Cadbury's Cocoahouse (presumably they are having some stab at being upmarket).

This month's PMS is going to be a breeze.
16.8.06 09:18


Good morning sports racers

Clerkenwell Towers is seemingly deserted today. It appears that a great hole has opened up and swallowed all my co-workers (or maybe people are just working from home or on vacation or something. Though personally I prefer the idea that they're all lying at the bottom of a big pit somewhere. Moaning).

Thus, I am going to turn up the speakers on my PC and spend the rest of the day going through the archives of The Show. Because Ze Frank is a god to me.

I recommend that you do the same. Even if you have to dig a big pit and push all your colleagues into it.
18.8.06 09:57


Just arrived from Lakeland Limited...

*sings* I'm going to make some chutney, I'm going to make some chutney...
18.8.06 11:02


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